How To Learn A Better Routine From A Baby

 

If there is one things babies know best it’s getting into a routine. As soon as Peanut wakes up in the morning she wipes the crusty eye boogies away and hops right into her daily routine.

Peanut is more consistent with her routine than a lot of other people. She delegates her time pretty well. There’s time for 6+ meals a day, workouts, naps and reading.

Do everyone a favor and eat breakfast in the morning! No one likes crabby Willem Dafoe when he hasn’t eaten his Snickers in the morning. Be more like Marilyn.

Pop culture references aside, we all know when you haven’t eaten anything because it shows. It’s scientifically proven people get angry when they’re hungry. The scientific word for this is hangry.

Don’t do that to yourself, or us.

Peanut goes crazy for her new bouncy seat. It’s basically a giant Nemo themed harness seat that is accompanied by Dori, Squirt and Mr. Ray (I remembered the song but not his name so I cheated and googled it). I would work out a whole lot more if gyms were Disney themed, just saying.

Also, according to sciencey things, working out is apparently really awesome for our bodies. Not just in the ‘I workout and look good’ way but the ‘yo I workout and feel good’ way. Working out releases dopamine and all sorts of other good stuff in the brain and improves overall health. It’s pretty much the best drug for you.

Check out a previous blog ‘Babies Workout Too’ to get off your lazy butt and work out!

Some people don’t advocate the whole nap thing, but I’m about it. You feel refreshed and recharged. Occasionally there’s a point in the afternoon where your body just goes ‘why are you awake right now’ and your productivity levels plummet.

So, to fix all of that take a 20-40 minute nap. If you think your 9-5 corporate grind doesn’t allow it that’s a bunch of hooey. If it’s that important, you’ll make time for it. My blog Baby Time can help you with that.

On your lunch break find a nap spot (they’re out there and just ripe for the pickin’) and get a little recharge in your afternoon.

Lastly, reading is pretty important. You learn a lot from it and it isn’t going anywhere any time soon. In a world with more readable content on a daily basis than at any other time in human history, you are bound to read a lot. But I think too many of us read stuff that isn’t fun.

Are we really passionate about what the Kardashians are up to in People magazine? Let’s just agree that there are better things to be read out there. Peanut likes keepin’ it real with her ‘Listen To The Birds: An Introduction To Classical Music’ book (shout out to Aunt Lauren).

In all seriousness though, exposing children to multimedia content at a young age can be really beneficial. Just make sure the content is good!

Picture Perfect

Easter was this past weekend. That means long meals with mostly unhealthy foods and posing for family pictures every ten minutes. After all the festivities died down, Peanut goes, “Dad why are so many pictures taken?”

So I go, “ because people want to remember special moments.”

Peanut fires back, “people must have really bad memory then. There are too many pictures. People should just fully experience the moment like me. That way they can remember it better.”

In a digital world where everyone fancies themselves a photographer, the Internet might burst at the seems with crappy photos. No literally, this article says the Internet is being affected by all the E-waste online and eventually hurts us as human beings.

Moral of the story is if the last four pictures on your Instagram account are selfies chances are no one likes you. Question your existence in knowing that you’re contributing to the fall of the Internet.

Okay, enough picking on the narcissistic readers out there.

You may say, “a picture is worth a thousand words,” but it’s hard to justify that statement when 400 of those words would be ‘like.’ And if anyone in the audience can write 1000 words describing a selfie of theirs, please send us a message. We are genuinely curious in reading your eloquent prose.

I don’t even think Shakespeare did that but hey, maybe we have a savant in the audience.

Instead of just bashing bad photographers, I’ll give you some advice.

Take a hike.

No seriously go for a hike or take a walk. And capture what you see through the lens. Photography should exude some resemblance of what your reality is and if that reality is duck faces at the bar try mixing it up a bit.

In a world crowded with selfie sticks and duck faces, I tip the hat to those who keep real photography alive. Simple, inspiring, emotional photography. If you don’t already follow these accounts you should probably get in here: Chris Burkard, Paul Nicklen, HUNY, and Theron Humphrey.

Ansel Adams limited himself to one picture a day during some of his most creative phases. Now I know I don’t have that diligence to just take one (it’s like eating cookies or chips). All I’m saying is make it special. Make the photos you take special and you will get more from them.

If those photog accounts above didn’t motivate you enough just google ‘urban photography’ and see what comes up. It’s funny how some of the best photographs occur in the oddest of places.

Have fun and don’t forget: Shoot Responsibly

A Baby Shoe Shopping Spree

You can tell a lot about someone by just looking at his or her shoes. See where they’ve been or decipher their habits.

Peanut prefers no shoes – Embodying a free spirit attitude and laid-back lifestyle. Occasionally, Peanut does throw on some footwear in the form of comfy socks (gotta keep those babies warm). Hopefully she doesn’t grow up to wear just socks in public or be a Shoobie from Rocket Power.

I’m going to start introducing Peanut to different kinds of shoes and see which ones she likes most. Some Vans or Toms would be a fashionable choice.

If Peanut wants to wear some funky shoes, I support her decision as long as she doesn’t use the line “It’s called fashion, look it up,” which I’m sure the designers of 20 Of The Weirdest Shoes, Ever said at one point or another.

But if we’re getting down to business and jumping in puddles, she should try some cool J. Crew rain boots. If she wants to wear flip-flops, I’ll let her (just not crocs).

Crocs are off limits, no matter what. Sorry Peanut, looks like you’ll have to go barefoot if the only option is crocs. Cowboy boots on the other hand, is always a yes.

Shoes can bring together an outfit nicely and when you’re a baby it’s all about microfashion.

We went into Asics the other day because I needed some new dad running sneakers. They have baby Asics sneakers that definitely only fit babies who crawl. I’m sure the importance of arch support for toddlers is crucial, but I guess Peanut will have to learn how we all learned, sans arch.

I’m all for spoiling my kid and giving them what they want but dang man, those shoes were expensive and she can’t even crawl yet. Maybe next year missy.

 

 

 

The 5 People You Meet On The Jersey Boardwalk

Going on walks are great for newborns. The movement usually puts them to sleep and they get some quality fresh air. All walks of life are out on the boardwalk too, so your kid gets to experience the ‘real world.’ And what a time it is to be alive.

1. The Surf Rat Skipping Work In The Winter To Catch The Latest Swell

It doesn’t matter whether he’s as old as Gandalf or a Young Buc, he’s getting in on some tasty waves and is letting everyone on Ocean Ave. know it. Often seen sprinting by you (top half of their wetsuit not even completely on) in the direction of the ocean yelling, “Yeeeewww.” Or, in groups returning to their cars with such dude-jubilation (or düdilation, if you will) that the entire block can hear. The words “dude,” “sick,” and “shreddable” are overused, but it’s all-good. Their employers would undoubtedly be impressed with the shred sesh.

2. The Elderly Lady Walking Her Small Dog

You know how they say owners look like their dogs. Well, that holds true here, too. It doesn’t matter whether the elderly lady is walking a Shih Tzu, a Maltese, a Chihuahua or a Pug, they are mirror images of one another. Jowls, poofed up hair and a look that’s little cocked to the side. They’re both cute in their own way.

And thank god she doesn’t stuff the little dog into her purse like Paris Hilton.

3. The Weird Workout Wonder

Now these workout anomalies are hard to miss and they leave a lasting impression. These people are indubitably grateful to be alive and are soaking it all up in the weirdest workout experience possible. They take on many forms.

• A hula hoop lady, blasting Madonna so loud through her headphones you can hear it yards away.
• A crazy elliptical guy (and sometimes his wife) who go 100 mph. I Googled the awkward looking and deadly fast Elliptical Machine On Wheels (or ‘Hell on Wheels,’ however you want to look at it) and the reviews were sublime, so maybe we’re the one’s missing out.
• A guy riding his bike bumping 80’s cardio music and singing along while taking his hands off the wheel and punching the air.
• An overweight guy who is sweating through his under layer and sweatshirt on a run in the middle of winter. But he’s kicking some ass and probably following up on some New Year’s resolutions.

4. The Old Local

He sits and ponders away as he smokes his cigar all day. You often smell him before seeing him, especially if you’re down wind from his Habanos Bolívar. He’s the type of guy you’d find playing checkers at a café in the square with the other guys from around the block and they all wear Irish Tweed hats and have croaky laughs. He doesn’t say much but always gives you a subtle nod as you walk past.

5. The Pack Of Gossiping Women

These bloodthirsty ladies group up every day to ‘power walk’ in their Active Wear. Amongst arm pumping and long gaits, they talk about the juicy town gossip. They faintly resemble birds chirping away at each other. And, just so everyone knows, Johnnie’s fiancé is a deadbeat according to Cheryl.